Real or Not Real? (A Zollie Story)
by onelittlemink
Summary: (Set after Season 20 Episode 1) Zosia helps Ollie to regain his memory after the shooting.
1. Chapter 1

Real or Not Real? (Zollie Story)

(Set after Season 20 Episode 1)

At some point before Zosia leaves, she pens this letter and gives it to Ollie's mum before Zosia leaves to go back to America.

Chapter 1

Dear Ollie,

I promised you that until you remember, I will keep all our memories. The good and the bad ones. I still believe we will get through this and get back what we once had.

So I have a proposal for you.

I know how much you love those soppy films so I got some inspiration from them.

In the Hunger Games, Peeta gets his memory all muddled up, kind of like you. Katnis comes up with a game to help him understand – Real or not real?

Now you have to promise me that if you remember anything, no matter how small you have to ask me. Ok?

Message me at any times. I'll always have my phone with me. But you have to promise?

It worked for Katnis and Peeta, so I know it can work for us.

I love you,

Zosia.

There were a few tear stains that managed to leak from Zosia's eyes onto the paper. She read through it once more before folding it up and stuffing it into the envelope.

She really didn't want to leave him like this but it was the best way at the moment. He needed to remember her on his own. Her being her wasn't good for him.

She made her way back onto Keller Ward and found Dom.

"I have to go. It's the best thing to do," she said, trying her best to keep her voice steady.

He nodded in reply, "At least stay for a New Year's drink with me."

At that moment, Blanche, Ollie's mother, appeared.

"It's time for me to go," Zosia explained to her.

Blanche raised her hand and caressed Zosia's cheek. "You take care. I'll keep in touch and let you know how he's doing."

"Thank you," Zosia rummaged inside her bag, "Can you please give this to him when he's ready?" She handed Blanche the letter. There was a moment and Blanche knew exactly when she was supposed to give him the letter. Blanche nodded and made her way to the side room where Ollie resided. Zosia glanced, watching her leave, wishing more than anything that she could walk into his room and he's know exactly who she was. She pulled her eyes away and back onto Dom in front of her.

"Please tell everyone I miss them," she hugged him quickly. "Please, look after him." she asked.

"I will," he smiled, trying to reassure her.

"I'll see you soon." She rushed off knowing she couldn't keep the tears in any longer and she didn't want to part from Dom knowing she was crying. Dom stood grounded on the spot. He hated seeing her like this but he knew it was the right thing. He would do everything in his power to get them back together; where they belong.


	2. Chapter 2

Real or Not Real? (A Zollie Story)

Chapter 2

Zosia constantly kept her phone with her even though it wasn't strictly allowed at Yale. She couldn't bear the thought of Ollie messaging and her not seeing it. Every buzz made her catch her breath, but it was never Ollie.

It had been weeks, now turning into months since she had left him lying in the hospital bed. She avoided remembering their last encounter at all costs. She had almost had a mental breakdown in the taxi on the way to the airport and she couldn't afford that. Especially being 3,000 miles away from home, without Dom, Ollie and her dad. Not that Guy was much help lately.

Her hope was beginning to falter a little. Ollie's mum had kept to her word and had been sending her progress reports regularly. A few photographs that she had managed to take on the sly. There was one in particular were Ollie looked incredibly proud of himself. She didn't know what he had done exactly but in the photo Zosia could see the old Ollie. Blanche had also been in contact when Roxanne had been able to remove the bullet. It was a relief and Zosia had hoped that his memory would improve relatively quickly after but time ticked on and still no contact from Ollie. Blanche mentioned that his physio therapy was going great. He had started to work of standing on his own with support from crutchs but Blanche said he was desperate to walk. Zosia knew that Ollie's drive would tackle that soon enough. But there was no sign of his memory improving much yet. Not of Zosia anyway. Not yet.

Her time at Yale was going well. She had done well for herself. Jac was pleased with the work she had been doing. Zosia knew that Jac was pleased for her but knew that Jac was also making sure that Zosia was holding up everytime she contacted her. Zosia was grateful. Jac seemed like a cold, selfish person but Zosia knew that Jac cared for her. Jac knew when Zosia was on the edge and had a funny way of managing to bring her back.

She had just finished a long lecture and burst out the doors, welcoming the fresh air that hit her. Her concentration wasn't the best at the moment and a two and a half lecture with little sleep wasn't the best way to keep her engaged. Her sleeping pattern had been eratic since she had come back from Holby. She couldn't sleep through the night without waking up to check her phone.

She was making her way through the campus, and heading for her apartment when her phone buzzed. She fumbled with her bag trying to extract her phone from her pocket.

"Ollie" The notification read. She couldn't believe her eyes. She made her way quickly to a bench and sat herself down. She prepared herself before opening the message.

"At the wedding, Guy got hurt. That's why it got ruined. Real or not real?" She read the message twice just to make sure that she wasn't dreaming. Ollie had remembered the wedding and Guy when he woke up but the conversation hadn't ended well. Ollie couldn't understand why he and Zosia had gotten married. He could just remember that it happened.

" _Real._ " She replied instantly. Zosia hated letting her mind go back to that day. It had been one of the best days and worst days in her whole life. She had so many conflicting feelings that she avoided thinking about. But Ollie was bringing them all up and she knew that she had to fight the urge to shut the feelings down because she knew that Ollie might need to hear them.

"He was in the bed. At the hospital. He got hurt. Glass. Blood." Zosia knew she should be happy that he was remembering. But she just wished it had been a happier memory.

" _Yes. That's right._ " She replied. She knew she wasn't supposed it put words into his mouth. He needed to remember on his own. He had broken down at the hospital when she tried to convince him that she was his wife and not Tara.

"He's in that house now. They look after him." The fact that Ollie was remembering Guy more than her was interesting but she looked past that. It was one step closer than this morning.

" _Yes. He is._ "

"Blue Planet. We watched it. Why? He hates me."

" _You visit him because you're a nice person_." She didn't really know what else to say. Ollie didn't have to visit Guy but he did.

"I visit him because of you. Real or not real?" She was shocked. This was the first mention of her. It wasn't a particularly nice association but it was a start.

" _I guess, real_." She typed. She didn't know how to explain that Ollie visited Guy because he loved her.

"Why?" He was making this quite difficult for her. She didn't realise that this was going to be so hard.

" _Because you're a kind a person_."

"You already said that." At least he hadn't lost his wit, she thought.

" _I know._ " There wasn't anything left to say. He had to work it out for himself.

There was a pause in the conversation. " _Anything else?_ " She asked. She had secretly hoped that he would have instantly remembered their love, the moment they started talking. But nothing was ever easy. Especially in the life of Zosia March.

"No." The question broke her heart a little. But she needed to stay resilent. She knew that if the tables were turned, Ollie would never, ever stop trying. She wouldn't stop trying either. But her mental state wasn't as stable as Ollie's and her greatest fear was slipping into another episode. She physically shook the thought from her head. She had to stay strong.

" _Ok. But just know that you can message me anything. I'm so glad you got the letter."_

"I got the letter." She thought that was the end. To her surprise, the phone buzzed again.

"And, thank you Zosia." She let out a little breath. Those three words were exactly what she needed.

That was it. She couldn't keep the conversation going. It had lasted a matter of minutes. She knew he would be overwhelmed with everything she didn't want to pressure him. She sat there in the middle of the campus, gobsmacked. She had been waiting weeks for this moment. Granted, it could have gone a whole lot better but she let that go. She felt a weight lift off her shoulders. He would do this! He was strong, and loving, and kind. There was still a long way to go but Ollie had taken the first step. Zosia had seen a glimpse of the old Ollie in his eyes when he had told her to leave the second time. He would pull through this. They would make it back to where they were before the accident: she knew it!


End file.
